In just six days, it will be December (when did this happen?) and, more importantly, the end of an era: Dunkin’ will start the process of killing off its iconic styrofoam cups. The Wall Street Journal reports that fans have responded to the news in the only way they know how: by hoarding the cups. But after you have your collection set, what will you actually do with them? Grub Street has some ideas.
1. Thanksgiving gravy boat.
2. Five words: the year’s best stocking stuffer.
3. Five more words: the new beer-pong flex.
4. Fill it with Four Loko Hard Seltzer, so you can drink it on the street.
5. An extra-large cup will just about fit an entire bottle of Champagne. Your New Year’s Eve plans are set.
6. Fill it with coffee, then walk around Boston shouting lines from Cheers.
7. Walk around Cambridge shouting lines from Good Will Hunting.
8. Walk around Southie shouting lines from The Departed.
9. Walk around Los Angeles shouting tweets from Bill Simmons, like “This is probably my least favorite music year from 1977–2000 but it turned into a wonderful multi-media package for @ringer check it out.”
10. Act like a conservative sports fan who is angry at your favorite team for gesturing toward “wokeness” and record a video of yourself lighting a pyramid of the cups on fire.
11. A party favor that guarantees someone will show up at your holiday party.
12. Periodically stare into the depths of your empty cup to witness the void within your soul.
13. Get one signed by Gronk.
14. Use one to catch a fly ball at Fenway. Become a NESN legend.
15. Cruise around with your collection while listening to the Dropkick Murphys.
16. Turn your living room into the ultimate Dunkies shrine.
17. Build a Styrofoam Sad Affleck statue.
18. Refuse to drink anything without it, including, and especially, at restaurants.
19. Amass a fortune by selling cups to the highest bidders on eBay, who will be named Pat or Donny.
20. Play a very intense game of flip cup.
21. Starbucks will give you a ten-cent discount for bringing your own cup. Just saying.