Yesterday we learned that Unilever, which operates on a multinational scale and produces everything from instant ramen to Klondike Bars, is suing San Francisco-based Hampton Creek, which makes a vegan spread called Just Mayo. The corporation says the eggless, emulsified whip is ruining real mayonnaise for everyone, and a courtroom drama with lots of white-knuckle showdowns over Canadian yellow pea proteins and tensioactive molecules is surely in the cards.
For now, however, Just Mayo sales have gone through the roof. “Grateful. More jars of #justmayo were sold today than any day in @hamptoncreek history,” Josh Tetrick, the company’s founder and CEO, tweeted. Clearly, Hellman’s will have to extend their old slogan if this keeps up. “Bring out the Hellman’s, and bring out the best,” it might go, “as is best profit margins ever for our number one competitor.” So far, Miracle Whip has remained silent on the emulsification issue, allegedly telling a condiment-friend that it’s just not its fight.