History happened this past Memorial Day at the Big Texan Steak Ranch in Amarillo, Texas, when a Nebraskan woman finished two 72-ounce steaks and sides of a baked potato, shrimp, salad, and bread roll in 14 minutes, 57 seconds. (The actual challenge is simply to eat a single dinner in less than an hour, but this feat was about glory — and a world record.) Molly Schuyler polished off the first steak in under five minutes, she said she “wasn’t really going for time,” with the second dinner. Schuyler put it this way to the Amarillo Globe-News: “There was no point. I had to do it in under an hour, so I was fine.” She then presumably lit a match on her boot heel and fired up a smoke. Now, you might be asking yourself, Is there video of the 5-foot-7, 125-pound self-described “bottomless pit” devouring such a feast? And you will be happy to know that we live in the year 2014, so of course there is.
Fair warning: There is little romance involved in the eating of 144 ounces of beef quickly — so only watch the video if you’re prepared to see something you’ll never un-see.