The Chain Gang

The Mountain Dew–ification of Taco Bell Begins With Three Brand-New Sodas

They say that every time a new soda is introduced at Taco Bell, an angel burps.
They say that every time a new soda is introduced at Taco Bell, an angel burps. Photo: Taco Bell

As part of its unprecedented, headlong rush toward the Singularity, Taco Bell is now selling three all-new sodas, called “Manzanita Sol®,” “Diet Mtn Dew Baja Blast,” and “Mtn Dew Sangrita Blast,” the latter two of which do not actually explode. Additionally, because tacos that have Doritos for shells can never have enough pairing options, three noncarbonated drinks have now joined the fray: “Brisk Iced Tea & Lemonade,” which is a fancy way of saying Arnold Palmer, the festive “Brisk® Mango Fiesta,” and something called “SoBe® Lifewater™ Yumberry Pomegranate,” which is made with genuine foraged yumberries. Expect that long-in-the-works Mountain Dew Passion-Fruit Frenzy Salad to launch any day now. [Earlier]

The Mountain Dew–ification of Taco Bell Begins With Three Brand-New Sodas