• Here’s something that probably harshed some folks’ St. Patrick’s Day revelry: On Saturday, police pumped three bullets into a meat cleaver-wielding man outside of an Olney bar. [Action News]
• Atlantic City police are in search of a man ho stole an ambulance Sunday and drove it to a bar. [NBC Philly]
• Police in Cumberland County, NJ repeatedly used pepper spray to subdue a woman who flew into a violent rage at a convenience store where she learned that there were no fully-heated sausages immediately available. [myfoxphilly]
• Among the baby names that Jessica Simpson and fiancé Eric Johnson had considered was Zinfandel. Because the kid wouldn’t grow up to be a raging alcoholic or anything. [In Touch]
• Turns out millions of urinary-tract infections in the U.S. might be caused by bacteria found in chicken; and they’re increasingly drug-resistant. [Atlantic]
• Both McDonald’s and the French supermarket chain Carrefour have been accused of selling expired food in Beijing. [CBS News]
• Don’t kid yourself: Chances are grocery-store ground beef contains some pink slime. Will this news finally squelch the burger trend? [Salt/NPR]
• Sorry, everyone, scientists are just as mystified as you about that strange metallic taste you sometimes get when eating pine nuts. [Salt/NPR]