Some people will do anything for a thrill. Take, for instance, all the sickos running around snorting asparagus powder, giving birth in Hardee’s parking lots, and accusing immigrants for the foie-gras-doughnut craze that’s been gripping the nation Brooklyn. And if all that weren’t sufficient cause for alarm, the weekly James Weird Awards certainly will be.
• A trailer containing 21 tons of mustard and ketchup was stolen from a trucking lot in Austria. The police aren’t certain whether the thieves were after the condiments or the trailer itself. [HuffPo]
• An Albuquerque grocery clerk was indicted for feeding a customer a yogurt sample that contained his own semen. The victim suspected something was awry when she realized that the “gross and disgusting” cup of yogurt in question “tasted like semen.” [Gawker]
• An employee at a combination Taco Bell-KFC in New York announced his resignation in an unusual way: by arranging the restaurant’s outdoor marquee to read, “I Quit - Adam. Fuck You.” The message was followed by a smiley face, presumably to soften the blow. [WIVB 4]
• A trio of little girls in Georgia was busted by police for running an illegal lemonade stand. The girls, whose ages range from 10 to 14, are coping with the financial loss by performing extra chores and yard work for cash. [WJCL]
• An off-duty McDonald’s manager in Georgia was charged with assault and battery after allegedly punching a mother in the face. The attacker is said to have become irate because the woman had brought in a service dog with her two autistic children. [Atlanta Journal-Constitution]
• A Colorado man was arrested after he was caught with two metal sheep that had been stolen from an area restaurant. Police were alerted by workers at a local metal recycling plant, where the man was trying to sell the statues. [ABC Denver]