The James Weird Awards

The James Weird Awards: Guilty O.J., Bloody Fries, and Music That Goes Straight to Your Thighs

Maggot melt? Baseball stadiums with “nut-controlled” seating? Imprisoned vegetarians denied healthy prison food? Sure, that all happened — but that’s not even the half of it. No, the rest of the week’s bizarre food news is hiding out right here, in the James Weird Awards.

• A man in New York was arrested after he broke into an apartment and “helped himself to a container of orange juice from his victims’ fridge.” Authorities didn’t have much trouble finding the burglar, given that he “helpfully left the carton, laden with his DNA, on the counter for cops to find.” [Gothamist]

• A baker in Scotland has created a chocolate record that can both play music and be eaten. He designed the first batch to play a song written by his friends’ band. Some people will do anything to get on the guest list! [Laughing Squid]

• When a London man’s dinner date was disrupted by a crying baby at the next table, he asked the child’s parents if it might be past the 7-month-old’s bedtime. The infant’s father responded by smashing a bottle of wine over the man’s head, leaving a four-inch scar on his scalp. [Daily Mail UK]

• Hold the ketchup: A Cracker Barrel customer in Houston got halfway through her meal before she realized there was human blood on her fries. Sickened, she brought it up to her waitress, who replied, “Yes, the guy did cut himself when he was making the sandwich, but he has a Band-Aid on it now. So, he’s good.” [KPRC-2]

• Diners at a restaurant in Washington State got quite a jolt when a customer wearing nothing but a wristband came in and sat at a table. “I thought he was wearing shorts at first,” said one man at the scene. “Then I realized there was no shorts.” At that point, the eyewitness “grabbed his phone and recorded the man’s every move for eight minutes,” because that’s not weird at all. [KATU-8]

• Remember when that woman was sent to jail for poisoning the salsa at a Kansas City restaurant? Well, her husband has just been given his very own prison sentence: ten years for conspiracy to tamper with a consumer product. The couple that poisons together, stays … er, never mind. [Kansas City Star]

The James Weird Awards: Guilty O.J., Bloody Fries, and Music That Goes Straight