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Funnies
June 7, 2011

And Now: A Collection of Curiously Eccentric Cheese Labels

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During a recent grocery run at Westside Market, Grub Street noticed something funny: a quote from “Maxwell’s Silver Hammer” was printed on a label for the store’s mozzarella. Huh? In fact, further inspection revealed that almost all of the store’s cheese labels were printed with out-of-nowhere quotes. Turns out the labels are the work of Peter Daniels, the store’s cheesemonger (who also sometimes goes by the nickname “The Doctor”). “I want to give people something to think about,” he says of his labels. “It started when I was watching a U2 concert. Bono said, ‘It’s about time we start saying it’s not okay,’ and it just struck me. That was the first quote I put on a cheese label.” We’re not sure what to make of them. They’re sort of like poetry? Straight ahead, we’ve rounded up ten of the best labels currently on display at the store so you can decide for yourself.

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1 / 10 Photos
MY MOTORCYCLE DOES 195---I LOST MY LICENCE-------SO NOW I CAN'T RIDE.......... MY MOTORCYCLE DOES 195---I LOST MY LICENCE-------SO NOW I CAN'T RIDE..........
MY MOTORCYCLE DOES 195---
I LOST MY LICENCE-------
SO NOW I CAN'T RIDE..........
Photo: Danielle Walsh
YOU GOTTA LOOK SHARP AND YOUGOTTA HAVE NO ILLUSIONS JUSTKEEP GOING YOUR WAY LOOKINGOVER YOUR SHOULDER - JOE JACKSON YOU GOTTA LOOK SHARP AND YOUGOTTA HAVE NO ILLUSIONS JUSTKEEP GOING YOUR WAY LOOKINGOVER YOUR SHOULDER - JOE JACKSON
YOU GOTTA LOOK SHARP AND YOU
GOTTA HAVE NO ILLUSIONS JUST
KEEP GOING YOUR WAY LOOKING
OVER YOUR SHOULDER - JOE JACKSON
Photo: Danielle Walsh
I HAVE NEVER UNDERSTOOD THEHUMAN NEED TO BECOME IRRATIONAL I HAVE NEVER UNDERSTOOD THEHUMAN NEED TO BECOME IRRATIONAL
I HAVE NEVER UNDERSTOOD THE
HUMAN NEED TO BECOME IRRATIONAL
Photo: Danielle Walsh
IF I TOLD U WOULD U BELIEVE ME,THIS IS MY BODY MY BLOOD WOULD URECIEVE MY DECIEVE ME IF I TOLD U WOULD U BELIEVE ME,THIS IS MY BODY MY BLOOD WOULD URECIEVE MY DECIEVE ME
IF I TOLD U WOULD U BELIEVE ME,
THIS IS MY BODY MY BLOOD WOULD U
RECIEVE MY DECIEVE ME
Photo: Danielle Walsh
IF GOD IS A D. J. THEN LIFEIS A DANCE FLOOR, GET YOURASS ON THE DANCE FLOOR NOW. IF GOD IS A D. J. THEN LIFEIS A DANCE FLOOR, GET YOURASS ON THE DANCE FLOOR NOW.
IF GOD IS A D. J. THEN LIFE
IS A DANCE FLOOR, GET YOUR
ASS ON THE DANCE FLOOR NOW.
Photo: Danielle Walsh
WEVE BEEN SEING WHAT YOU WANTEDGOT US CORNERED RIGHT NOW FALLENASLEEP FROM OUR VANITY,MIGHTCOST US OUR LIVES. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . WEVE BEEN SEING WHAT YOU WANTEDGOT US CORNERED RIGHT NOW FALLENASLEEP FROM OUR VANITY,MIGHTCOST US OUR LIVES. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
WEVE BEEN SEING WHAT YOU WANTED
GOT US CORNERED RIGHT NOW FALLEN
ASLEEP FROM OUR VANITY,MIGHT
COST US OUR LIVES. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Photo:...
WEVE BEEN SEING WHAT YOU WANTED
GOT US CORNERED RIGHT NOW FALLEN
ASLEEP FROM OUR VANITY,MIGHT
COST US OUR LIVES. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Photo: Danielle Walsh
WHEN WALKING THE PATH OF TRUTH IT IS EASY TO LOOSE YOUR WAY-----THE DOCTOR WHEN WALKING THE PATH OF TRUTH IT IS EASY TO LOOSE YOUR WAY-----THE DOCTOR
WHEN WALKING THE PATH OF
TRUTH IT IS EASY TO LOOSE
YOUR WAY-----THE DOCTOR
Photo: Danielle Walsh
HER EYES WERE SMOKEY GRAYSHE HAD ME AT HELLO. . . . . HER EYES WERE SMOKEY GRAYSHE HAD ME AT HELLO. . . . .
HER EYES WERE SMOKEY GRAY
SHE HAD ME AT HELLO. . . . .
Photo: Danielle Walsh
BANG BANG MAXWELL'S SILVER HAMMER CANE DOWN UPON HIS HEAD----PAUL MCCARTNEY BANG BANG MAXWELL'S SILVER HAMMER CANE DOWN UPON HIS HEAD----PAUL MCCARTNEY
BANG BANG MAXWELL'S SILVER
HAMMER CANE DOWN UPON HIS
HEAD----PAUL MCCARTNEY
Photo: Danielle Walsh
THE LINE BETWEEN MADNES ANDGENIUS IS ALWAYS CURVINS ANDPREFORATED---THE DOCTOR THE LINE BETWEEN MADNES ANDGENIUS IS ALWAYS CURVINS ANDPREFORATED---THE DOCTOR
THE LINE BETWEEN MADNES AND
GENIUS IS ALWAYS CURVINS AND
PREFORATED---THE DOCTOR
Photo: Danielle Walsh
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