Yes, it is only Tuesday. And yes, we are about to talk about a Tribune Review. But (a) it’s in Tempo/Q instead of Dining, and (b) author Kevin Pang is bylined as “Cheeseburger Bureau Chief,” which — now that we have been anointed Special Guest Headcheese Taster — is next on our list of Titles To Acquire In Life.
Not to mention (c), the restaurant in question is Kanye’s Fatburger (15110 S. La Grange Rd, Orland Park, 708 364 8380), which as Pang points out is “a consolation prize when it comes to Southern California fast food imports,” but sure as hell better than nothing at all. Pang rates the burger high — but not too high. It ranks just under Culver’s butterburger, but the beef is well-seasoned and freshly ground, and the toppings are good.
Incomprehensibly to us, the Trib’s reviewer claims that the addition of bacon and a fried egg “were not worth the $1.98 investment,” which means either that this was a burger whose perfection was so exquisite that adding bacon and a fried egg was like adding 1 to infinity, which is to say an infinitesimal drop in an unmeasurably large bucket, or somehow Fatburger managed to screw up the two easiest-to-make-delicious foods in the history of animal products, or perhaps Pang is sadly immune to the lure of bacon and a fried egg, in which case we question his Chiefhood of the Cheeseburger Bureau.
It’s worth noting that yesterday, TOC could not confirm Kanye’s involvement, but the Trib attributes the franchise to him. Pang also notes that while he was fishing out his wallet to pay the whopping $14.77 (for a kingburger, onion rings, and lemonade), Mr. West’s “Golddigger” came on the store’s music system. Which is enough confirmation for us, anyway.