We have no idea what’s real and what’s fake anymore. Actually, we never did.
• April Fools! A fake review of Sixteen, press release shill style, to commemorate the imaginary purchase of Time Out Chicago by Donald Trump. Of course, it, and things like it, can and do happen all the time. So it’s almost more sad than funny. But that’s the way we like it! The eleven stars in falsie (why not sixteen?) trumps (so to speak) the four (out of six) the realie from a few weeks back.
• TOC’s legit feature (by co-U of C alum Laura Oppenheimer) is on restaurant name etymology. The piece mostly covers fried chicken, soul, and bar & grill-type places; we want to know just exactly how middling Chinese restaurant Takie Outit got its name. Is the final ‘t’ silent? And so forth.
• Chris Borelli did an entertaining round-up of chain mac & cheese, none of which earned higher than a “B.” The worst: Boston Market.
• Phil Vettel’s piece on winter produce exhaustion is the sprightliest thing he’s done in recent memory, we will go out on a limb and contend. We especially enjoy this construction:
It’s gotten so bad that Carol Wallack, chef/owner of Sola restaurant, has taken up smoking.
“You look for something to keep your interest,” she says. “We have an indoor smoker, and we smoke what we can. We’ve smoked our miso cod, for Kahlua pork potstickers, for pork butt wrapped in banana leafs. We’ve smoked our Canadian bacon and salmon for brunch. This time of year, we get pretty protein-heavy.”
Heh heh heh. Deadpan serves you well, Mr. Vettel!
• Speaking of the big V, remember last week when he was lamenting the lack of good egg salad sandwiches? Apparently 200 sympathetic souls came to his aid, the oddest suggestion being the egg salad sandwich that used to be served at Bellvue Hospital in New York. Um…thanks?
• Finally, Mike Nagrant wants you go to skillfully pan-Asian Guan in Evanston (he calls it a “modern womb”), and Judy Hevrdejs appreciates the effort being made at The Balanced Kitchen, an organic vegan restaurant in North Park.
[Photo: something crazy at Schwa]