We were going through reviews for our New York site (this is nobody’s fault, but New York gets, like, 15 to 20 times more new reviews a day than Chicago), and we came across this humdinger entitled “A must try for all!”:
One of the best local eateries I have been to in a long time! Very hospitable service; they made me feel as if I was the only patron in the establishment. The appetizers, especially the pita tart and hummus were delicious. The filet mignon is my absolute favorite and you cannot leave without having tried the cheesecake. Kudos to [REDACTED]!
No. Sorry Mr. Owner, but no one uses this type of formal, maybe-you-were-educated-in-the-British-fashion-in-a-former-colony-style English in restaurant reviews. “Made me feel as if I was the only patron in the establishment?” Come on. First of all, it ought to be “as if I were the only patron,” but furthermore, no f’n way an actual customer would write anything like that. And we wrote the book on “kudos,” so don’t even front.
Besides, the same IP left a similar review with a different user alias a few weeks ago. Nice try, though!