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Need Your Fix of Johnny Iuzzini News? You’re in Luck!

It's Z-man's happening, and it freaks us out!
It’s Z-man’s happening, and it freaks us out!haha

After we had some sport with Johnny Iuzzini earlier this week, the dessert master was pretty steamed — he even asked us to take him off our list. No problem, but wouldn’t you have thought we would be off his? Not so! Yesterday brought us our long-awaited issue of “See What’s Up With Johnny,” the official Johnny Iuzzini newsletter. “As usual, Johnny has been receiving quite a lot of buzz,” it assured us, going on to quote Grub Street as calling the tattooed wunderkind “the most influential dessert chef working today.”

We still stand by our claim (much as we kid him, Zs’s skills are beyond question), but we see now that we should have gone further. After all, “Johnny is turning into quite the superstar!” Quite. For instance, we learn that he will be a judge on Top Chef 4 and made desserts at Macy’s inspired by perfumes: “Johnny surely delighted everyone’s senses.” We’ll say he did! We still dream of him covered in vanilla frosting. Oh, Mother! Who knew you could serve beefcake for dessert? But don’t feel that Johnny Zs has to be a distant, godlike figure to you the way he is to us. After all, “If you plan on attending any of his events, please say ‘Hello.’ Johnny loves meeting fans!” (Except for us, we guess.)

Related: Johnny Iuzzini’s Plea: Elect Me Sexiest Chef!

Need Your Fix of Johnny Iuzzini News? You’re in Luck!