News You Can Use: Erotic Culinary

We were wandering around the internet, like you do, and with very little warning, found ourselves at an article on Womanspassions.com entitled “Erotic culinary“. We swear to whatever god you believe in that the word “erotic” was not part of the Google search that led us there. At any rate, the article is basically about the historical use of aphrodisiacs along with some DIY recipes.


But we found the lack of a byline confusing, and when we started really reading instead of skimming, we came across sentences like this: “Such culinary serves as a base of family relations, as it teaches a husband and a wife to remain attractive and sexually active, regardless of age and life troubles.” And later, on fried food: “Such food creates an excess of slime, contributes to adiposity, tiredness, heaviness. As a result, when time comes to a love game, it isn’t accompanied by trembling and excitement, and turns into a usual satisfaction of physiologic needs.”

Oh dear…what an astute observation, though. We don’t have the foggiest notion whether this was written by an idiot savant, an ESL dropout or a randy translation algorithm, but we also cannot deny certain universal truths about the relationship between food and sex that are explored in this piece.

The bit about fried foods is totally true, as is the inverse, “[f]resh natural products, subjected to minimal temperature treatment, are wholesome not only for health, but also for love.” Starkly obvious, sure, but not wrong. Let’s get to some specifics, right? This whole paragraph is required reading:


By the way, in China, having a thousand-year erotic culture, there was a special cook-erotic in an emperor’s staff. He cooked food, which allowed emperor to contact with hundreds of concubines constantly. It’s known, that one of potions was cooked of antlers. Comminuted antlers were poured with honey and vodka, extracted on a special sort of wild cherry. Then 40 sorts of herbs and spices were added. A Chinese emperor drank such drink before entering harem. Servants of harem watched closely that emperor satisfied all the concubines (presumably, about 30 ones daily). Erotic power allowed to judge whether he’s able to rule a country.

We were wandering around the internet, like you do, and with very little warning, found ourselves at an article on Womanspassions.com entitled “Erotic culinary“. We swear to whatever god you believe in that the word “erotic” was not part of the Google search that led us there. At any rate, the article is basically about the historical use of aphrodisiacs along with some DIY recipes.


But we found the lack of a byline confusing, and when we started really reading instead of skimming, we came across sentences like this: “Such culinary serves as a base of family relations, as it teaches a husband and a wife to remain attractive and sexually active, regardless of age and life troubles.” And later, on fried food: “Such food creates an excess of slime, contributes to adiposity, tiredness, heaviness. As a result, when time comes to a love game, it isn’t accompanied by trembling and excitement, and turns into a usual satisfaction of physiologic needs.”

Oh dear…what an astute observation, though. We don’t have the foggiest notion whether this was written by an idiot savant, an ESL dropout or a randy translation algorithm, but we also cannot deny certain universal truths about the relationship between food and sex that are explored in this piece.

The bit about fried foods is totally true, as is the inverse, “[f]resh natural products, subjected to minimal temperature treatment, are wholesome not only for health, but also for love.” Starkly obvious, sure, but not wrong. Let’s get to some specifics, right? This whole paragraph is required reading:

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News You Can Use: Erotic Culinary