Bourdain Body-Slams the Food Network Awards

Some highlights of Tony Bourdain’s lively excoriation of last night’s Food Network Awards, just posted on Ruhlman:

“Okay … so some brain dead douche bags from Ad Sales and ‘creative’ got together and cooked up this hybrid, fur-bearing catfish of a beast, this jackalope of a High Concept. Fine. That’s what they do. But who green lit this monstrosity?”

“The production itself — above and beyond the witless, ill-considered, just-plain stupid “concept” of an Awards show where most of the awards’ went to inanimate objects (accepting the award for Best Comfort Food is … Macaroni and Cheese!!), appliances or cities (Portland’s mayor wisely did not bother to show), — the production values — were lower than whale shit.”

“Did the network, upon realizing (as they surely did) that the whole thing was a hideous, stultifyingly boring cluster fuck — and a public slap to their talent — did they consider maybe having the good taste to just bury the whole thing in archives like a rotten bone? They reportedly had no trouble burying the Ripert and the Ramsay episodes of the excellent, critically acclaimed My Country My Kitchen. Have they no decency?

There’s a famous story where Robert Mitchum walks into studio head David O Selznick’s office, pulls down his pants and takes a crap on his white carpet. I hope Emeril is pinching a loaf right now.”

But honestly, Mr. Bourdain, what did you think of the program?

The Fabulous Food Network Awards!! [Ruhlman]

Bourdain Body-Slams the Food Network Awards