"My friend Amy Sedaris came over and we started eating tomatillo sauce and Late July chips as a snack in the afternoon, and I ate so much that I just kept on going."
"I told myself that it was a really cute little European lunch, but really it was just leftovers."
"I grab my phone, press send, and my coffee and muffin appear at my door."
"I don't mess with queso frito anymore."
"Things are warm and wonderful."
"I decided I was going to go crazy this week."
"For whatever reason, I got to Philly and I became obsessed with finding fake cronuts."
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"It feels like I'm in the middle of a military operation."
"My friend and I don't eat the buns at all. We just sit there and rip apart all the chicken."
"Normally, I would stuff my face with pain aux chocolats or crepes ... but dinosaurs, even French ones, didn’t have much in the way of dough."
"I'm not going to do this article and not drink Riesling. Like, yeah, even if I had a Cabernet from California I'm gonna tell you?"
"I had a slice of one-dollar pizza and a lovely chat with a hairy transvestite dressed all in white."
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"Avocado is the new pork fat."
"We're hunters, so we ate venison that my wife and I shot."
"Mid-recipe, we also snacked on toasted bread that had been used to soak up some of the fat from the sliced marrow medallions roasting in the oven."
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"I'm a big guy. I can't fit in at these trendy places where you're squished."
"It's some kind of walnut-y, vinaigrette-y, thyme-y thing and it's f-cking awesome."
"The Chinese bakeries were just starting to open, so I stopped in one of those and I had a steamed bun with Chinese sausage inside it and a small coffee with milk and one sugar."
"The pretzel roll is my weakness. It's like a warm roll and a pretzel. Together. With butter. Let me know if you hear what I'm saying."
"Actually, while I was feeling incredibly hungry on the train, I made an OpenTable reservation for dinner at Il Buco Alimentari."