Things did not go well for the girls this week.
The entire episode had a strange mercurial undercurrent.
And see what happens when kids get strapped together while baking cupcakes.
The show is much more entertaining than you might think.
Chefs brought miso caramel apples, lobster meatballs, and plenty of shaved truffles to go around.
And just like that, the world gets a new Top Chef.
Tonight, we celebrate Cajun culture by getting the hell out of the bayou and heading to Maui.
"... Those intrusive Toyota insta-polls ask variations on 'Do you think Nick is the worst?' and the results are overwhelmingly YES."
"Roy Choi and his colorful children’s clothing are here to supervise the Quickfire Challenge."
"Have you fully reacclimated to real life after what must have been the longest holiday season on record?"
"God almighty, can you imagine the combination of being 18 and having easy New Orleans access?"
"When Dr. John clarifies that 'hip tang' is the main element he seeks, Padma says, 'I understand,' and the wonderful thing is that she totally does."
"Teams of four will cook a potluck-style dinner for some jazz types at Kermit Ruffins's restaurant. This seems like an easy one to ace; jazz people are notorious stoners."
"Would you believe me if I told you 'suck my dick' were among the first words spoken in tonight’s Top Chef?"
Nina feels a rivalry with Michael because they both wear hairstyles that make them look like they're playing Lucy in a repertory-theater production of You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown.
"I really have it in for truffles, you guys."
"This is the age of deconstruction. Go nuts, young chef. Put a Jolly Rancher and a quail egg on a small pile of hay, and let Padma figure it out."
"The ice in this dashi is the ricin in the last few episodes of 'Breaking Bad': You know that sh-t is coming back. "
"Gail Simmons looked great, and I swear if I were her man I'd treat her like gold."
"Last night was episode nine in this incredible series, and things are seriously getting so down to the wire I've stopped wearing pants altogether while viewing."