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Kylie Jenner Versus an Egg Is the Celebrity Feud We Deserve

Ever since Instagram was invented, restaurateurs have been involved in an ever-escalating war of Frankenfoods. Turns out the joke is on them for wasting all that time and money on Cronut knockoffs and dyed bagels. A plain old photo of a nicely freckled egg became the world’s most-liked Instagram post last night when it reached 18.2 million likes and beat out the previous record holder, Kylie Jenner’s birth announcement post. The photo was posted on January 4 with the explicit goal of besting the now former champion, and remains the only post on the Egg Gang account. When the owner of the account realized that history had been made, they posted a celebratory story, saying, “This is madness. What a time to be alive.” Indeed, all of our ancestors’ dreams have come true. We are living in our stupidest possible future. To think that only a year ago, no one thought it could get dumber than Salt Bae.

Since becoming one of the world’s most famous people last night, the egg has rapidly gained clout. The post amassed another 10 million likes by 9 a.m. today, surpassing 28 million likes. That’s about 3 million likes shy of the population of the world’s largest city, Chongqing; 28 times the population of Montana; and almost half of Donald Trump’s total number of votes in the 2016 election. (It is an inevitability, now, that people will vote for the egg in the next presidential election.)

Of course, the Kardashian-Jenner family did not achieve their celebrity by acting like pushovers, and Kylie wasted no time responding. Like Tony Soprano kneecapping a rival, she posted a video of herself cracking an egg on the ground, with the caption “take that little egg.” It is not yet clear if this was the egg, just another egg, or one the egg’s cousins.

No doubt Jenner was motivated by egg stans taunting her, as well as by the Egg Gang account’s vague words that “it doesn’t end here.” What could this mean, though? What brave new world is being promised? And what exactly is Egg Gang trying to achieve? The egg, so far, has remained silent.

Kylie Jenner Versus an Egg Is the Celebrity Feud We Deserve