Most Terrifying Burger of All Time Is Sold at Lotteria in Japan

Don't do it.

The same Japanese fast-food chain that introduced scary milk shakes and the ramen burger — the one where noodles stand in for the patty, not the next-generation version — has seemingly now outdone itself with the "With Everything Burger," an $11 behemoth built on solid cheeseburger foundation, then layered with a bonus beef patty, a fried shrimp patty, a boneless rib slab, fried egg, more cheese, pickles, lettuce, cabbage, and three kinds of sauces to add some much-needed white noise, or maybe mouthfeel, who knows? It weighs in at 1,449 calories, but how scary is it in real life?

Okay, so, this looks like it's going to be intense.

Oh, wait, maybe it's not so bad.

Okay. It actually seems manageable.

Never mind, false alarm. It seems the "With Everything Burger" isn't even the chain's most calorific burger-thing. That honor seemingly goes to Lotteria's "Exquisite Cheese Burger," a semi-limited-edition towering inferno of cheese goo and five beef patties. We'll hold out for that one.

Okay, This Japanese Fast Food Chain Has Gone Mad
Earlier: Japanese Burger Chain Releases Limited-Edition Ramen Burger Because It Can