The Fifty Shades of Grey Wine Is Leather-Flavored

Here comes the apocalypse.

Author E.L. James, noted fan of booze, is expanding her empire by selling wine. "Red Satin" — which includes flavors of leather, apparently — and "White Silk" are on sale now for $18 per bottle. James says she hopes "you curl up with a glass as you enjoy the romance between Anastasia and Christian." But if you have a book in one hand and a glass of wine in the other, how will you masturbate? [Deadline]