What’s Sadder: Taylor Swift Breakup Songs or the Idea of Ordering a Taylor Swift CD With a Papa John’s Pizza?

Photo: Courtesy Papa John's

It’s obviously a trick question, one that’ll likely never cross your mind when it finally sinks in that you can score a large cheese pie and the newest release from the bewildering songstress for the low, low price of $22. The pizza-box-top promotion worked for Jay-Z back when Decoded was published in 2010, and now Swift offers you her very own Tumi of lyrical baggage for you to unpack. So settle in, hopefully with a two-liter Sprite: After one slice, melancholy will set in. As you round the crust on the second you may feel the urge to smile awkwardly, twirl in a sea of dandelions, and/or text Jake Gyllenhaal. Go with it. There may be teardrops on your guitar and pepperoni between your teeth, but extra cheese is always good. [Papa John’s, Vulture, Earlier]