The food world tried to teach us a few lessons this week. First: Don't swallow cinnamon (unless you put it on some applesauce or buttered toast first). Second: Don't steal from poor, defenseless food carts, because it's rude. Third: Do not, under any circumstances, provoke a cranky Jamie Oliver. He will snap. More what-not-to-do parables can be found in the James Weird awards, straight ahead.
• A man in Florida stole a six-foot-tall pizza costume from a Papa John's restaurant by simply leaving the restaurant while dressed in it. The man was accompanied by an entourage of six people, who we assume intended to distract employees from the sight of a giant slice of pizza (complete with pepperoni, mushrooms, green peppers and black olives) walking out the door. Well done, entourage! [ABC Action News]
• Thieves stole a 500-pound beehive valued at over $1,000 from outside a restaurant in Houston. The restaurant's chef told local media that the thieves were wise to the bees' habits, since the theft occurred on a cold, rainy day when the bees were likely to be less active. Lesson: Chilly, sleepy bees make better targets. [HuffPo]
• A quartet of undercover base-jumpers skipped out on the check at a penthouse cocktail bar in Melbourne, Australia by jumping out the window. Parachutes helped the friends survive the 55-floor drop to the ground, where a getaway car was waiting. One can only imagine the stunt they'd pull for a pricey steak dinner. [Sun UK]
• A billboard erected by the Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine in Chicago reading "Hot Dogs Cause Butt Cancer" has caught the ire of the National Hot Dog & Sausage Council, who claim the PCRM is attempting to "create a vegan society" by vilifying hot dogs. Hey, every group needs an arch-nemesis. [Chicago Tribune]
• Beijing officials are planning to re-translate into English the names of over 3,000 Chinese menu items so tourists can avoid the awkwardness that comes with ordering foods like "chicken without sex life" (young, tender chicken) or "bean curd made by woman with freckles" (mapo tofu). [China Daily]