This week at the mother ship, a server from Per Se dishes on some of the restaurant’s worst customers (including those who are strictly forbidden from ever going back to the restaurant again). Some of the acts committed: sex in the bathroom (“that happens quite a lot,” says the server), cheating on your spouse with your dinner date, describing your blow job technique for your waiter, and there was one woman who threw up on the table mid-meal, but then finished dinner after a quick cleanup. She evidently doesn’t get credit for rallying. But of course Per Se isn’t the only restaurant with bad customers.
Empellón Tacqueria chef Alex Stupak takes to his restaurant’s website to address a similar issue: He’s wondering when it’s okay to “fire” customers, and he has his own short list of activities that will get you eighty-sixed: don’t snap photos of celebrities you might see in the restaurant, don’t bring a “horrendous” store-bought birthday cake when you could instead order a good one in advance at the restaurant, and don’t ask for “melted yellow cheese” on any of the restaurant’s dishes. But while Stupak doesn’t explicitly mention throwing up on your table as a dining-don’t, we’ll go ahead and guess that it will probably be frowned upon, too.