what not to drink

Don Johnson Celebrates Four Loko’s Terroir

Even though Four Loko is vanishing from bodega shelves (albeit slowly — when we popped into the liquor store next to Belleville, New Jersey’s great La Sicilia on Monday, we were told they were expecting a delivery the next day), Funny or Die is keeping the joke going, via a spot for Don Johnson’s Four Loko Vineyards: “We harvest our high level of caffeine from the finest guarana plants smuggled into the United States in the lower intestines of nomadic orphans.” Probably not what Wine Spectator meant when they said wines should have a narrative.

Four Loko Vineyards With Don Johnson [Funny or Die]
Related: ‘Satan’s Piss,’ and 49 Other Things Four Loko Tastes Like

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