Apparently we weren’t even exaggerating when we told you that the Commodore’s Stephen Tanner would rather chew broken glass and sleep in a hollow log than talk to the food press. The fried-chicken virtuoso is so allergic to publicity that it seems he had a kitchen underling assume his identity for an interview on a recently aired fall-themed episode of the show. Although the segment identified a whiskered, tattooed, apron-clad man seated at one of the dive bar’s booths as “Stephen Tanner, head chef,” it was pretty clear to anyone who’s ever seen Tanner in person that this was not the true Tanner, but a Tanner impostor. Furthermore, the fake Tanner appeared to be reading his lines from cue cards. “My mom taught me how to cook fried chicken when I was a kid,” he said unconvincingly. “The food here is a great fall anthem because it’s very spicy, hearty, heavy, comfort food,” he went on in the manner of a hostage with a gun to his head.