Here’s the first line of a Staten Island Advance item about a drug bust at cop-hangout Ruddy and Dean: “Authorities say a popular bar and steak house located in the shadow of the borough’s legal system had something else on the menu— cocaine, served up to an undercover detective by the restaurant’s chef.” Ha! Something else on the menu! And now for your late-Friday amusement, some other inspired openers about six local food establishments whose employees were busted for selling cocaine.
• “A Brooklyn butcher shop worker called his specialty ‘hot kielbasa’ — for snorting, not eating.” —Brooklyn Eagle
• “Three people bought peppers at a Queens store last night and found them even hotter than they expected — all of them had bags of cocaine inside, police sources said.” —New York Post
• “Give me a cheeseburger, some jalapeno poppers and a bag of cocaine, please.” —New York Post
• “A Mister Softee vendor was scooped up for making deliveries of cocaine while blaring the trademark jingle up and down his Long Island route, cops said yesterday.” —New York Post, once more
• “‘I’ll have a large pie, half-pepperoni, half-cocaine.’ A Bronx pizza parlor that delivered drugs as well as calzones was busted … ” —New York Daily News
• “Police say a Jersey City restaurant was used as the base of operations for three suspected drug kingpins accused of serving up cocaine with their frijoles to the tune of $35,000 a week.” —ABC News