We didn’t think anybody could look hot in the basement of a Gristedes. But after four six-hour days in one of UCB’s Level One intensives, Padma Lakshmi proved us totally wrong during her required graduation show. Wearing a see-through top, she giggled through the other team’s performance, even during a scene about a young girl courting men at an AARP singles night. (Her date, Teddy Forstmann, didn’t laugh.) When the “All White and a Little Brown” team took the stage, Padma (presumably the “little bit of brown”) performed a monologue about being an “everything but” girl in high school (as were all of her friends). She talked about skipping school to get drunk with a guy who tried to figure out what exactly was on the menu: sex, everything but, or “anything goes.” We learned that a wedgie is called a “murphy” on the West Coast, and there are different “euphanisms” for oral sex and handsies, too. Here’s hoping Padma keeps improvising. We’d love to see her at Under St. Marks or doing a set in Long Island City. We’ll even buy her a hoodie and some Converse to replace that see-through top.