Derrick Rose Needs To Take A Knife Skills Class

Derrick Rose (he is a Chicago Bull and apparently a big deal — just in case you, like us, know basically nothing about sports) recently needed 10 stitches as a result of gashing himself open while slicing apples:

Rose missed Monday’s practice after he needed 10 stitches to close a gash suffered when he said he rolled onto a knife while eating an apple in bed.

“It was a silly incident,” Rose said. “I was cutting up some food and I laid on a knife getting lazy in bed. I went to go get a bottle of water, came back, forgot the knife was there, then sat down and sliced my arm.”

When we recovered from our giant attack of WTF, we did the legwork for Derrick and looked up upcoming classes on how to use a knife. The well-received Wooden Spoon course is next offered on January 6, and if Rose can’t wait that long, the Chopping Block has them at least once a week.

Rule #1: Don’t leave your knife in your bed, you freaking idiot.

Even if you have mastered that first rule, taking a knife skills class is a great idea for home cooks. We took one a few years ago and it completely changed our lives, and we’re probably due for a refresher. Plus, at less than $50 a pop for a one-time deal, it makes a great gift for friends, loved ones, and accident-prone athletes.

Rose Learns the Danger of Carving Apples [Sporting News]

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Derrick Rose Needs To Take A Knife Skills Class