The keys to Apothéke aren’t the only ones you’re going to want on your key chain — Down by the Hipster reports that a secret club billing itself as “New York’s Most Exclusive Nightlife Experience” will debut this Fashion Week. It’s called El Baño, but somehow the Website, replete with images of toilets (“el baño,” of course, means the bathroom) doesn’t convince us that the “certain famous chef” (whose menu includes the trifecta of Kobe beef, foie gras, and pork belly) and the “famous mixologist” (serving up a Tecate float and a guava sidecar) actually exist. As for the lounge’s location, we’re told only, “if you’re supposed to know where we are, you know where we are,” and given a QR code that leads to a secret page which reveals, “El Bano is a secret club, and like all things secret it's only known by few.”
To gain access to the club you must first possess a key. You see, first you go into a lovely little bodega and enter the bathroom with your key. You will see a bouncer in the bathroom guarding a stall. You give him the nod and he'll open the door and a wall will slide open revealing the club. Getting a key is easy. If you're our friend you already have one. If you're famous or strikingly beautiful, you already have one. We make mistakes though, and may want to offer you a key. E-mail Us, and let us know why you deserve a key.
Hmmm, so there’s a hidden panel in a Lower East Side bodega? Sounds suspiciously like the Boston clothing shop Bodega. We’re curious to read DBTH’s upcoming “interview” with the “management,” but if this is indeed satire, how will it hold a candle to club NM-UH? Competition is fierce even in the world of fake clubs, it seems.
The Key to El Baño [Down By the Hipster]