Assigned by BlackBook to go deep inside Bijoux, the hideaway under Merkato 55, former “Page Six” scribe Fernando Gil finds an “opulent, smoky, dare-we-say soft-porn effect, as if you’d stumbled into the Sultan of Brunei’s secret lair, minus the harem of Latvian girls (which are of course kept in a separate room further down).” (UrbanDaddy, get this man on staff!) None of this is surprising except for the mime — yes, the mime — who appears on the scene. Was this the doing of the party’s hostess, the one and only Tamsin Lonsdale, or is the mime Bijoux’s official mascot, something akin to the Ass at Mr. Black or Raven O. at the Box? Either way, nightlife veterans are always complaining that clubs aren’t what they used to be. Granted, a mime doesn’t have the flash of the drag queens of old, but maybe, just maybe, there’s hope.