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Punk’d by Pinkberry

Clockwise, from top left: Benny Tagliareni, Vanessa Rosario, EZ Delarosa, and Ligia Mathias.
Clockwise, from top left: Benny Tagliareni, Vanessa Rosario, EZ Delarosa, and Ligia Mathias.

Back in those heady days when the small-screen Sex and the City reigned over New York, it was all about skinny girlie-girl Miss Charlotte York and her tasteless Tasti D-Lite. Let’s hope that this summer’s big-screen SATC has caught up with the times, because any body fat–phobic New Yorker knows that today it’s all about that tangy frozen yogurt Pinkberry. “All natural!,” its makers initially bragged. But now, the dollop is out of the cup: A class-action lawsuit accusing Pinkberry of deceptive marketing has forced the company to reveal that its all-natural concoction is amply propped up by, as the Times reported, “three kinds of sugar,” “at least five kinds of additives,” “four acidifiers,” and “two ingredients…that were characterized as fillers.” (Fillers!?!?!? Run!!!) So we popped around the corner to our favorite Lucite-happy Pinkberry-fix clinic (uh, franchise) to ask the warm-spring-day Pinkaholics if they felt devastated and betrayed. They do, kind of. —Tim Murphy

Benny Tagliareni, 28, office-supply sales rep, Chelsea.

Do you come here a lot?
A little too often. It’s very addicting. Almost like crack.
How would you describe the taste?
Different. Um, sour. Um, natural.
Well, it’s not all natural.
Is that unnatural stuff?
Yeah.
It’s still good, though! Is that bad for you? Is it going to kill you?
How do you feel inside when you eat it?
It’s like having a candy bar.
Well, who knows how bad this stuff is for you? All it means is that it’s not natural.
Everybody’s trying to make a living, right?

Vanessa Rosario, 24, dental assistant, Washington Heights.

Did you think Pinkberry was all natural?
That’s how they advertised themselves. One of the dentists in my office was coming here two or three times a day. This was substituting his meals.
Is this news shocking to you?
I’ve never looked at the ingredients of yogurt, but I didn’t think it had fructose in it. But this one does.
What about Tasti D-Lite?
Uch, no. I don’t eat Tasti D-Lite. It’s all fabricated — disgusting. There’s nothing wholesome about it. You’re ultimately eating garbage. But I don’t expect any fast food to be healthy at all.

EZ Delarosa, 45, photographer, Hell’s Kitchen.

How do you feel about Pinkberry?
I love it.
Think it’s all natural?
I’m not sure what it is. I hope it is.
Well, it’s not.
Well, I’m addicted to it. There’s not much I can do about it.
What about Red Mango?
I haven’t heard of it.
What about Tasti D-Lite?
I don’t like it. It doesn’t taste good.

Ligia Mathias, 30, salon assistant, Park Slope.

What do you think is in Pinkberry?
They say it’s yogurt. I think it’s yogurt.
Well, yes, but other stuff, too. Do you feel betrayed?
I assumed there was other crap in it.
Where are you from?
Brazil. São Paolo.
Do you have stuff like this there?
We do. But it’s not really popular. It’s very expensive and kind of a fancy thing to have.
What’s the fun snack there?
Açaí. It’s a frozen fruit. It’s very earthy, and you mix it with other fruits. It’s supposed to be very natural.

Punk’d by Pinkberry