Our Pick for Richman's Replacement: Ashford Lawrence, Shirtless Critic

While the food world wonders who will assume Alan Richmans reviewing mantle, wed like to offer an endorsement: Ashford Lawrence, a food critic like no other, played by local comic and Chappelle's Show regular Donnell Rawlings. Despite a fondness for ascots, Ashford betrays a twinge of pedestrianism when he dines shirtless at New Leaf Caf and requests wines such as a Tublanc Shakur and a 2013 Chardonnay (I like my wines from the future). Okay, so he doesnt have the most sophisticated grasp of food he declines a Heron Pinot Noir by snipping, I dont do drugs but, then again, Richman was never a hard-core foodie, and if theres a line worthy of Richman's hyperbole, its Ashys verdict on the lamb: Its like a midget cow! All we ask of you, Bloomberg higher-ups, is that you watch the video.