Is Crack Back in the Kitchen?

It's morning in America's restaurants.
It's morning in America's restaurants.haha Photo: Getty Images

Everyone knows that kitchen workers, and cooks in particular, lead an unwholesome lifestyle. But crack? From what we’re hearing, the rock is coming back to the junior toque set. “Guys are doing it all over the place,” a source told us the other night. “They use the glass pipe and everything.” We’ve heard similar stories elsewhere around town. Maybe it’s just our Reagan-era brainwashing, but aren’t you supposed to become a urine-stained beggar at the Port Authority the minute you try this drug? Or is it just a more concentrated, addictive form of cocaine, as reported by the sober verdict of science? Either way, crack could be the party drug of choice among tastemaking degenerates, at least until they start pilfering capons to feed the habit. So is coke just too pricey on a line cook’s wages? We’re relying on rumor for now, so please narc in the comments.