Where Are the Restrooms at wd~50? No, Seriously — Where?

And a magical nymph whispers, “Push the wood.”
And a magical nymph whispers, “Push the wood.”haha Photo: Melissa Hom

It’s no secret that wd~50’s bathrooms are as byzantine as its food. Even The New Yorker’s reviewer Kevin Conley wasn’t smart enough to figure them out: “It can take minutes to realize that you have to push the wall — a Mensa-test experience so disconcerting that one diner wound up down the hall in a storeroom.” Having seen our share of hidden doors (Pukk and 44, for starters), we knew we’d be okay when we went downstairs to confront the beast.

Concept: An aquatic mosaic over communal sinks makes the push doors in the bamboo wall seem like beach bathhouse entrances.
Privacy: When someone tries to push your door open, confuse him even further by calling out, “Don’t enter! Wylie’s lab!”
Amenities: Two door hooks — so you can hang up your jacket and your pants.
Drawbacks: The retro drop ceiling panels make you paranoid that Marcel Vigneron, while stealing a recipe, is going to fall out of the ceiling at any moment.
Strategy: Chat up the cutie at the sink next to you by asking if she’s heard about this place called Tailor.