Last time we went to Coney Island we got oysters from a clam shack right before it closed. And oh, we also got Hepatitis A. Now we’re immune, but nonetheless we’re grateful that the newly opened, spick-and-span Coney Island Surf & Turf Grill offers plenty of options that won’t destroy our liver — aside from the offerings at the tiki bar (our poison of choice: Shmaltz Brewing Company’s newly released Coney Island Lager). In the back of the garagelike space, decorated with pics of old and contemporary Coney-baloney (as our sword-swallower friend Heather Holliday likes to call it) is a custom-built brick oven dispensing thin-crust pizzas. Yes, there are oysters, and should the cheesy plastic crab decorations move you to order the real thing, you can hammer snow crabs, blue crabs, and angry crabs with a mallet. Meatheads, meanwhile, can indulge in ribs and chicken smoked in-house. And here we thought smoking only occurred under the boardwalk.
Coney Island Surf & Turf Grill, 1315 Surf Ave., nr. Stillwell Ave., Coney Island, Brooklyn; 718-513-6491.